Life Lesson(s)?

How to make therapy more useful: remember I'm the one paying the bill. I've may have just lucked out with my 2 therapists (although I guess I did try a lot of different ones years ago and before starting with my new one), but I think every single human could benefit from therapy just as much as from seeing a physical doctor (primary care, whatever). I should look into those numbers: mental health treatment count vs. PCP treatment count... that data is definitely available somewhere.*

*See, I don't hate my 'line of work' ... it's possible to have a career I enjoy(ish) even without self-medicating (aka being high all the time).

Anyways, per usual got stoned and had a bunch of thoughts that felt incredibly useful in the moment so I'm rushing to get them all out while typing before I get distracted by something else - and/or let the fear of the massive amount of work I have to do subconsciously make me not want to write here/work on this. Yeah I think that's the best way to sum up how I feel about this website... but the key is, that's okay. I know I have a life lessons group somewhere ... or maybe a page started, but I'm sure I already have this written down (in some form or another) because I know that it takes things awhile to get through my thick skull. My therapy session today (3rd one... is this just the honeymoon phase of therapy!? TBD) has left me feeling much better about a lot of things. My hope is that if I can fix all the little seemingly irrelevant emotional 'issues' in my life (i.e. lack of friends in this damn city) by fixing my perspective about it - thanks to the therapist's input, since he's the one who studied for this shit - then eventually I will overall feel like more of a real human again.

"Have some grace with yourself" --> when I said my monthly goal for oct. was to meditate every day (excluding weekends, but it's only been 12 days haha) that was his response & we talked about how difficult getting into the habit of meditating is.

"Living with discomfort" I think is the name of an Insight Timer meditation I did recently (I'll check - eventually), and I'm ever so slowly starting to understand how to do that. I always say "I wish self-awareness led to instant self-correction" but now I'm thinking "well being aware of it is halfway to solving the problem ... hey that's a positive trend in mood, what a win.

On that note... back to my ice cream.

xxS

Side note post-publish: why do I have to update the actual content for 'update' to work? I'm sure the answer is in one of the million of 'how to' docs I have open in tabs 'to read eventually' ... so far, eventually hasn't occurred.